How children cope with change or loss

Nothing stands still - everything changes. Any change, whether happy or sad, planned or unexpected, can lead to difficulties. Changes can be scary and overwhelming, epecially for young people who do not have the experience to know that they can live through the change and come out on the other side. Children and young people may find it hard to tell you how they feel. Instead, they are likely to show their feelings by what they do. They may believe that the change or loss is somehow their fault, which can add to the confusion.

Children may show distress by:

acting younger than they are, eg going back to wetting the bed
becoming angry more often than usual
becoming quiet and withdrawn
crying more often or becoming clingy
refusing food or eating too much
having difficulty sleeping or waking up.

Teenagers may experiment with drugs, drink or early sex as part of a reaction to loss. Parents cannot take away the experience of change or loss or the pain that children are feeling. But it will help them cope if you let them know that you understand and that you are there and love them.